I Asked for a Discount at Starbucks (Rejection Therapy)

The Premise: We don't ask for things because we are terrified of the word "No." We think "No" is a physical blow. We think it means we are worthless.

The Solution: "Rejection Therapy." The goal is to go out and intentionally get rejected 10 times in 24 hours. If someone says "Yes," I fail the round. I need the "No" to desensitize my ego.

REJECTIONS 9

ACCIDENTAL YES 1

> LEVEL 1: THE WARM UP (EASY)

ATTEMPT #1: The Burger Refill

I walked into a McDonalds showing an empty wrapper.

Me: "Hey, can I get a refill on this Big Mac?"
Cashier: (Stares blankly) "We don't do that."
Me: " Are you sure? It's just like the soda."
Cashier: "Sir. No."

HEART RATE: 120 BPM

Result: REJECTED. It felt awkward, but I survived.

> LEVEL 2: THE STARBUCKS DISCOUNT (MEDIUM)

This is the classic Rejection Therapy move. Asking for a discount for no reason.

ATTEMPT #2: The 10% Off

Barista: "That will be $6.50."
Me: "Can I get 10% off?"
Barista: "Do you have a AAA card? Or student ID?"
Me: "No. I just want a discount."
Barista: "... Why?"
Me: "Because I asked nicely?"
Barista: "I can't do that."

HEART RATE: 95 BPM

Result: REJECTED. The fear was already dropping.

> LEVEL 3: THE HIGH STAKES (HARD)

I needed to escalate. I needed to ask for things that were borderline insane.

ATTEMPT #3: The Stranger's Dog

I saw a woman walking a Golden Retriever.

Me: "Excuse me. Can I walk your dog for 30 seconds? I just really miss my dog." (I don't have a dog).
Woman: (Clutches leash tighter) "Um. No. Sorry."
Me: "Okay. Have a nice day."

Result: REJECTED. She looked visibly creeped out.

> THE ACCIDENTAL SUCCESS

This was where the experiment backfired.

ATTEMPT #4: The Olympic Donuts

I went to Dunkin' Donuts. I decided to be annoying.

Me: "Can you give me 5 donuts, but link them together like the Olympic Rings? And color them?"
Baker: (Sizes me up) "You want the Olympic rings?"
Me: "Yes."
Baker: "Give me 10 minutes."

Result: SUCCESS!? I was shocked. He actually did it. He seemed bored and happy for a challenge.

Lesson: Sometimes people are just as bored as you are. They want to say Yes to something interesting.

> THE SHAME CURVE

Here is the trajectory of my embarrassment over the day.

9 AM

9 PM

Panic Attack

Zen Master

By 5 PM, I felt invincible. I realized "No" is just a sound wave. It cannot hurt me.

> RAPID FIRE ROUND (5 PM - 8 PM)

I tried to get the last 5 rejections quickly.

Request: "Can I make an announcement on the train intercom?"
Result: "Sit down immediately." (REJECTED)
Request: "Can I trade my shirt for your shirt?" (To a guy in a park)
Result: "Get away from me." (REJECTED)
Request: "Can I interview you for a documentary about nothing?"
Result: "I'm busy." (REJECTED)

> CONCLUSION

The world is surprisingly polite. Most people didn't yell. They just said "No" and moved on. The fear of rejection is 100x worse than the rejection itself.

"If you aren't getting rejected constantly, you aren't asking for enough."

Start small. Ask for the discount. Ask for the upgrade. Ask for the date. The worst they can do is give you a word. The best they can do is change your life.